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Friday, December 5, 2008

Feb 17, 2006: Adam, Eve and the Apple - An ode in the honor of the celibate youth of our country (An Engineer's perspective)

God created Adam, Eve and the forbidden fruit. Adam was lucky because he faced no competition in fetching the apple from the tree and impressed Eve. Though he incurred the heaven's wrath, his job was done. Eve was his!
Cut to the present times. Though the number of Adam and Eves increased by leaps and bounds, the number of fruits that the forbidden tree has borne has not grown in proportion and that has left a lot of Adams in the lurch. Who's to blame - the poor Adam, the ever demanding Eve or the tree? Well how about a guy named Sir Issac Newton! If it was not for him, no one would have known that the apple from the tree can fall by itself onto our laps owing to gravity. His discovery of gravity was a turning point in the history of mankind as it led to the creation of a class of Adams who sit under the tree waiting for the apple to drop. This class of Adams is widely found amongst Engineers. Having closely followed the trails of many such Adams, I found a number of reasons behind their tendency to wait for the apple to fall rather than dare to pluck it:
a.) His(The nerdy Adam's) formattive teen years are generally spent behind a pile of books of all sorts. Maths, Physics, Chemistry, x, y and z. Following the path of perseverence and self afflicted penance to reach out to the elixir of life which he mistakingly searches in the books, the budding engineer sees reason in the logic offered that the thrills and frills of life can wait.
b.) The day he qualifies for a top notch engineering institute, he starts to believe that he is of a superior race. He considers himself a gift to humanity and laughs off at the idea of chasing a girl.
c.) When he enters an engineering school, he is surrounded by people belonging to his school of thought. What loads the dice against this poor guy is the fact that in an engineering college, you have a very skewed girl-boy ratio.
d.) All his fantasies bite the dust as his qualifications stand guard to protect his celibacy. Any attempts to venture into the outside world of non-engineers fail as he finds it difficult to converse in an alien world. He talks in terms of 'probablities' instead of 'luck/chance' and cracks jokes which are pathetic(because his sense of humor is generally the non-veg kinda!)
e.) He is not classy. He clings on to the 100 rupee t-shirt of his first college fest for four years. Goes to the City Malls and other hep areas with chappals on and unkempt hair( tends to use comb only if it comes from his neighbour's cupboard).
It is at this time that he realises that he has walked many a miles and is at a point of no return. He makes some desperate attempts, if at all, and predictably fails. Why? Because he never learnt the art of fetching the apple from the tree. He heeded to the warnings of the Gods and never ventured out to pluck them and then that damn Issac Newton came and professed that crap about the apple falling by itself - That sealed his fate.
And the poor Adam kept waiting under the tree..

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Who is this Adam?

Sensible Garbage said...

If I say its me, you will probably believe it. But its about a general class of people who have never walked that extra mile and resorted to excuses for not doing so. A better answer to your question would be - If you cannot find a bit of yourself in this Adam then its not you for sure.

Krishna said...

sala...is umar me likha hai...humare liye kuchh nahi hai ab isme.
hope u also have next-generation readership and they pay heed to your warnings :D

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